Black-Man: The first oxymoron!

Squire Grooktook: AH HA
Squire Grooktook: The Clan Man just got online
Your chat with Combustible Lime is now a multi-user chat.
Combustible Lime: o
Combustible Lime: yo
King Nook™ entered chat.
Combustible Lime: hello
King Nook™: yes.
King Nook™: hello
King Nook™: Who are you?
Combustible Lime: I am Prime
Squire Grooktook: He's Prime of The Gratifying Fluids
King Nook™: I know of prime.
Squire Grooktook: Indeed
Squire Grooktook: Say something awesome
Squire Grooktook: Right now!
Combustible Lime: and on a side note crunchy has called you a nigger, Squire Grooktook.
King Nook™: You ask a lot.
King Nook™: that's not nice.
King Nook™: No one deserves that.
King Nook™: this reminds me
King Nook™: There was a cook book called "The Pasta Bible"
King Nook™: that was taken out of printing because of a typo
King Nook™: "add a pinch of black peopleA"
King Nook™: people*
Squire Grooktook: lol
King Nook™: instead of pepper
Squire Grooktook: Also lol Crunchy
Squire Grooktook: I remember him
Squire Grooktook: But I'm not black so I cannot take offense at that
King Nook™: Crunchy.
King Nook™: tell me, did i like crunchy?
King Nook™: sure you can.
Combustible Lime: Yeah he hangs on xbox now and he seems to have a lot of 12 yo friends
Combustible Lime: I think he might be a pedophile
Squire Grooktook: lol
King Nook™: there is a simple test.
Squire Grooktook: I thought he was a baby himself
King Nook™: If you throw some salt on him and ring a bell, he'll be too busy fucking children to notice
Combustible Lime: You make me laugh way too much TCM
King Nook™: I think you're the first one to call me that in a few years.
Squire Grooktook: such a touching reunion
Squire Grooktook: Here have some chocolate
Combustible Lime: That is how I remember you.
Combustible Lime: Chocolate is good for all occasions.
King Nook™: I do get tired of screen names and all.
Squire Grooktook: Indeed
King Nook™: I've been trying to find a few old people online
King Nook™: not age old, but i mean from older times.
King Nook™: Hmm, what was the name of that dick-lick who always wanted to fight with me on F5?
King Nook™: i never really payed that much attention to thim.
Squire Grooktook: Uhhhh
Squire Grooktook: YoIamonfire
Squire Grooktook: /Tai
King Nook™: no, not that one
Combustible Lime: good times
Combustible Lime: Sox?
King Nook™: because i'm convinced that he was trolling me best he could.
King Nook™: yes, sox
King Nook™: I'd like to arrange something with him.
Combustible Lime: You can reason with guidos
King Nook™: But more so the one they called Rainmaker.
Combustible Lime: cant*
King Nook™: which one is guidos
Combustible Lime: sox
King Nook™: I was confused by him.
King Nook™: I never found him very interesting
King Nook™: which is unfortunate.
Squire Grooktook: I wish to see Rainmaker again too
King Nook™: because usually the people who dedicate their attention to me are more interesting.
King Nook™: rainmake's voice was made of pedophile and flatulence
Combustible Lime: You're an AHB
King Nook™ disconnected.
King Nook™ entered chat.
Combustible Lime: Care for a crumpet?
Squire Grooktook: I would like one
King Nook™ disconnected.
Combustible Lime: Have you seen I wanna be the guy?
King Nook™ entered chat.
King Nook™: have i returned once again?
King Nook™: my interenet is being made of suffering.
Combustible Lime: yes
Combustible Lime: I know the feeling
King Nook™: I had some things to say about rainmaker's voice. did they end up here?
Combustible Lime: rainmake's voice was made of pedophile and flatulence
King Nook™: followed by?
Combustible Lime: nothing
King Nook™: "this gives him the curious appearance of shitting child rape out of his mouth."
King Nook™: that part was very important.
Squire Grooktook: lool
King Nook™: I bought my second MPH copy for the purpose of fucking with that guy
Squire Grooktook: lol
Combustible Lime: Tell me, have you seen I wanna be the guy? It's an evil game made for masochists.
King Nook™: I had a dream once that i pulled a hunk of his hair out and shoved it down his mouth then told him that he desreves this.
King Nook™: I have not seen this.
King Nook™: I do not actually play video games these days.
Combustible Lime: It's a game ment to make you die many times.
Combustible Lime: anything can and will kill you
Combustible Lime: apples for instance
Squire Grooktook: Yes
King Nook™: I did beat VVVVVV at the request of a web site i visit.
Squire Grooktook: they defy gravity to kill you
King Nook™: I have played a game where birds shitting on you will kill you
Squire Grooktook: when you pass under them, they fall and kill you (except when they don't) and when you pass over them, they fall up and kill you (except when they don't)
Combustible Lime: Even spikes do it
King Nook™: If i desigend a game things would be very different.
King Nook™: Your character would be a hunched over black man
King Nook™: and your quest would be to steal enough shiny things to impress your bride
King Nook™: Eventually she would throw herself at you in the traditional mating dance of the dark skinned.
King Nook™: and you would take your final battle which ended in death or sexual climax, but extra points if you manage both.
Combustible Lime: Your first goal is to steal a tv from the kings private sex dungeon.
Squire Grooktook: game of the year
King Nook™: then you get too lazy to complete the level
King Nook™: and go to sleep
King Nook™: level two is a dream
King Nook™: but you're too lazy to finish the dream about stealing a TV so you wake up and continue to steal the real tv
Squire Grooktook: When is this gaming getting pc port
King Nook™: then in the end the whole thing was a dream. take that inception.
Combustible Lime: We must go deeper
King Nook™: It can't be played on any console unfortunately
King Nook™: for it steals any platform it is put near.
King Nook™: it's super realistic you see.
Combustible Lime: You get sucked into the game and then you are the hunched over black man
King Nook™: but what would i call such a game?
King Nook™: I have an idea
Squire Grooktook: Yes> ?
King Nook™: "Black-Man: THe first oxymoron!"
Squire Grooktook: lol
Combustible Lime: if you fail to complete the game you are returned to the real world as a negro
King Nook™: a statement which directly contradicts itself.
King Nook™: black man
King Nook™: as if a thing is human you see
King Nook™: yes?
Squire Grooktook: Yes
King Nook™: I would like to see such a thing made.
Squire Grooktook: I laugh
King Nook™: i think it would make me play games again.
Combustible Lime: this reminds me of a peculiar story
King Nook™: go on
Combustible Lime: I was walking down the street one day when i saw a black man stealing a tv
Combustible Lime: i thought it looked like mine
Combustible Lime: but then i remembered mine was at my house shining my shoes.
Squire Grooktook: South Park taught me racism can be funny
King Nook™: ah, i am amused.
Combustible Lime: The Boondocks and Chappelles show taught me that
Squire Grooktook: This is such a god tier convo
Squire Grooktook: It's just like old times
Combustible Lime: back when you were haunted by a lamp?
Squire Grooktook: Yes
Squire Grooktook: Also this reminds me
King Nook™: Ghosts follow me around because i can kill them.
King Nook™: and set them free.
Squire Grooktook: At the Srk forum, the lead programmer for Skullgirls was taking Q&A for his game
Squire Grooktook: People started asking him if he would be advertising the game while wearing a top hate and moncole
Combustible Lime: You are a soul reaper
Squire Grooktook: monocle
Squire Grooktook: and while holding a cane
Squire Grooktook: he said he would the monocle
King Nook™: I shouldn't go into this
King Nook™: but I got really drunk a few weeks ago and got in an argument with a statue for looking at me funny
King Nook™: I feel like I won.
Combustible Lime: I would call it a victory
Squire Grooktook: Yeah
Squire Grooktook: here is the thread of which I speak
Squire Grooktook: http://shoryuken.com/forum/index.php?threads/questions-answers-thread.146958/page-24
Squire Grooktook: "Mike_Z" is lead programmer and designer of game
Squire Grooktook: "When I think of a public speaker for Skullgirls I think of a guy in a top hat and monocle holding a cane. I don't know why. I think it's the old timey film feel. My point is, would you be willing to wear a top hat and monocle. "
King Nook™: if i ever need glasses i'm getting two monocles.
King Nook™: that's VERY classy.
Combustible Lime: Have you ever had your spaghetti fall out of your pockets?
King Nook™: no but i did find a marshmallow in there one morning after a late night out.
King Nook™: it was melted.
Combustible Lime: Have you ever got your dick stuck in the fly?
Combustible Lime: word of advice
Combustible Lime: dont
King Nook™: No. I can't say that i have
King Nook™: I have made people zip up various parts of their body in their "fly" though.
King Nook™: for general punishment.
Combustible Lime: You have painted a room by making someone explode in a colorful mess, yes?
King Nook™: Somewhat.
King Nook™: i did that to the mother so that the son would hurry up and paint my room.
King Nook™: i didn't want blood all over
King Nook™: but i felt i had to make my point somehow.
Squire Grooktook: I see
King Nook™: the mother cannot survive without the child.
King Nook™: it's the secret to killing bears.
Combustible Lime: I have made a genius troll plan
Combustible Lime: I will buy an island for myself
Combustible Lime: and infest it with zombies
King Nook™: the change people to be killed by them?
Combustible Lime: People will come from all over to attempt to hunt these zombies
King Nook™: I think people should give me money.
Combustible Lime: but when they fail the zombie population will grow and I will be rich as I collect their money.
King Nook™: for no reason in particular.
Squire Grooktook: Ilu u guis
Squire Grooktook: Too bad I'm probably the least awesome person in this room right now
King Nook™: hmm?
Combustible Lime: eventually I will grow a powerful enough zombie horde to take over the world
Combustible Lime: and start my own country
King Nook™: i feel like this would be useful for a distraction.
Squire Grooktook: What will you call it?
Combustible Lime: the flag will just be a picture of a middle finger
King Nook™: Dicklandiafuckyou
Combustible Lime: Dicklandiafuckyou the zombodia providence.
Squire Grooktook: I thought Providenes were for canadians
Squire Grooktook: canada: discuss
Combustible Lime: cowboy hats and dingos mate
King Nook™: I'm mailing american money to a canadian girl i know online
King Nook™: so she can have real money
Squire Grooktook: Prime
Squire Grooktook: Can I come to your contry when it is done
Squire Grooktook: But I must know what the laws are first
Squire Grooktook: and the offical language
King Nook™: the first law is to obey
Combustible Lime: Onlt if I put the plan into action first
King Nook™: the second law is to pay takes or be eaten.
King Nook™: taxes i would say
King Nook™: fuck this human form.
Squire Grooktook: Hmmmm
Squire Grooktook: I'll think about it
Squire Grooktook: Also I have had a surprise
Squire Grooktook: It turns out the shirt I'm wearing has been holy the whole time
King Nook™: you have the option to pay in flesh rather than money
Combustible Lime: The third law is that you must obey the fourth law
Combustible Lime: there is no fourth law
King Nook™: The fourth law states plainly that no hats are to be looked at
King Nook™: you will see
King Nook™: the 5th law however tells a story of a man and a dog
King Nook™: the 6th tells of the dog's betrayal of the man
King Nook™: the 7th is a laundry list
Combustible Lime: the man goes crazy while the dog dies
King Nook™: and the 8th says "fuck all those who see but do not look, who hear but do not listen. The time shall come when all shall be killed for their crimes unto the zombie lord and his son's eye"
King Nook™: the man and the dog are a symbol.
Combustible Lime: and the dog haunts him and tells him to murder people to amuse his dogginess
King Nook™: the dog is loyalty
King Nook™: the man is power.
King Nook™: loyalty betrays power.
King Nook™: but power survives in the end.
King Nook™: for it is powerful.
King Nook™: this is a lesson.
King Nook™: it is better to be strong than loyal.
King Nook™: who needs friends when you can destroy your enemies single handed.
Combustible Lime: deeper than an ocean trench
King Nook™: longer than the nose of a canadian jew.
King Nook™: This girl i am sending things to
King Nook™: what else should be included?
King Nook™: I want it to be theatening but not illegal.
Combustible Lime: dick in a box
King Nook™: i'm assuming a severed hand will be illegal.
Combustible Lime: my favorite
King Nook™: stupid laws.
King Nook™: Hmmm, perhaps so.
King Nook™: I really do wish that rainmaker could be here. I would love to spit on him ever so much.
Combustible Lime: it sends a strong message
Combustible Lime: obey me
King Nook™: simple
King Nook™: we should form a new computer company
King Nook™: Apple has "Think Different"
King Nook™: we would have "Obey"
Combustible Lime: or i will force you to grow a dick and then cut it off and ship it to another girl.
King Nook™: "But sir, this isn't a computer. it's an empty box!"
King Nook™: that's right little girl
Combustible Lime: the cycle repeats itself
Squire Grooktook: OH SHIT I HAVE TO SLAY A DRAGON
King Nook™: it's a box full of your empty lives
King Nook™: you and your parents. leave me before i cut your head off and place it in that box
King Nook™: and send it home with your grieving parents.
Squire Grooktook: OH IT'S JUST A BALROG NEVER MIND
King Nook™: fools
Combustible Lime: The most brutal gift of all... nothing.
King Nook™: give us your money
King Nook™: obey
King Nook™: I'm secret squirrel.
King Nook™: i do secret things
King Nook™: involving squirrels logic.
King Nook™: squirrely logic is the best logic.
King Nook™: I'm giving you a fun thing to try now.
King Nook™: I hear my roommate in the kitchen.
King Nook™: i will yell the first thing either of you type
King Nook™: go
Combustible Lime: MAKIN TOAST
Squire Grooktook: INFERNO DIVIDER
Combustible Lime: BUTTERIN TOAST
King Nook™ disconnected.
Squire Grooktook: ha
King Nook™ entered chat.
Squire Grooktook: Oh well I killed the Balrog
Combustible Lime: toast confirmed for internet disabler
Squire Grooktook: actually team did it
King Nook™: shit, as they say
King Nook™: what did you say firsT?
King Nook™: i seem to have lost connection
Combustible Lime: MAKIN TOAST
Squire Grooktook: we did it with science
King Nook™: oh screw it, i'll just yell at him
King Nook™: I asked him not to move my eggs. not even a little.
Combustible Lime: tell him he has been a naughty girl
Combustible Lime: and he must be spanked
King Nook™: he's fucked up on somethng and it looks like what i said scared him.
King Nook™: he keeps like 500 dollars worth of Acid and marijuana in the freezer.
Combustible Lime: Most people would store that in their anus for conveniance. he sounds weird.
King Nook™: yeah, quite weird.
Squire Grooktook: Ok I'm done looting the demon's corpse
King Nook™: he's from iran.
King Nook™: that explains everything.
King Nook™: I have several roommates.
King Nook™: two are from iran.
King Nook™: we are squised into a small apartment. yet, i have my own room and bathroom. I told them that they could share and they agreed.
King Nook™: it's amazing what you can get when you tell people you have extremely contageous disseases.
Combustible Lime: https://www.youtube.com/user/stgggs#p/u/9/K6iA2Pxucwc
Combustible Lime: trolling all day
King Nook™: is this your youtbue then?
Combustible Lime: no
Combustible Lime: it is a trolls
Combustible Lime: he spits fire
King Nook™: I see.
Squire Grooktook: I can spit fire
King Nook™: I live on youtube most of the time
Squire Grooktook: I learned fire breathing as a conflict resolution skill from the best
King Nook™: they have changed youtube format once more\
King Nook™: and the interent is angry
King Nook™: this was punishment for their sins.
Combustible Lime: get out of here werewolf
King Nook™: werewolf? that term has been tainted.
Combustible Lime: Hers the rules no werewolfs, no demons, no vampires.
King Nook™: this is the age of twilight.
King Nook™: such things have been polluted.
Combustible Lime: If only females could be reasoned with.
King Nook™: they're not smart enouh
King Nook™: enough
King Nook™: don't try
King Nook™: I tell them this frequently
Combustible Lime: what forums do you frequent now?
King Nook™: I go to a place called the gaming guild. it's a place i go to and do not spam.
Combustible Lime: I'm Chris Hanson and im with dateline NBC
King Nook™: have a seat
Squire Grooktook: by the way would you guys like to play a game where you get to punch
Squire Grooktook: Spiderman in the face
Squire Grooktook: It's 15 years old nearly I'm sure you're pc's could run it on emulator
Squire Grooktook: hold on lemme kill these orcs
Combustible Lime: I've played a game where I shot a hooker and mario
King Nook™: i'm talking to my cousin on the phone
King Nook™: she's durkn
Squire Grooktook: Yes
Squire Grooktook: Actually what I am referring to is GGPO which lets you play 20 year old fighting games on the internet with almost no lag
Squire Grooktook: It is quite the experience
Combustible Lime: Tell her to eat a lime
Squire Grooktook: I must make one or both or all of you play it with me one of these days
King Nook™: she's crying.
King Nook™ disconnected.
King Nook™ entered chat.
Combustible Lime: a lime will cheer her up
King Nook™ disconnected.
Combustible Lime: what a terrible night to have no internet.
Combustible Lime: or a curse
Squire Grooktook: Oh wow I just got injured by a rat with dynamite strapped to his back
Combustible Lime: alla akbar
Combustible Lime: its been a very interesting chat
Combustible Lime: good to see TCM still has all his wisdom
Combustible Lime: I particularly like his test to find out if someone is a pedophile
Squire Grooktook: Yes
Squire Grooktook: I would go for it if I were you
Combustible Lime: If you throw some salt on him and ring a bell, he'll be too busy fucking children to notice
Squire Grooktook: Yup
Combustible Lime: we must do this again some time.
Squire Grooktook: This is the kind of convo that deserves to be immortalized in text file and spread across message board forums for future generations to enjoy and cherish
Squire Grooktook: Indeed

reptilians